I'm the only person I know who finds me really funny, nevertheless
You might be a DISPENSATIONALIST if...
You might be a DISPENSATIONALIST if...
1. You think other Christians are anti-Semitic
2. You’ve never read Hebrews
3. You can justify being 2000 years late for an appointment
4. You’re really bad at math
5. You think Kirk Cameron is a fine actor
6. When the going gets rough, you’re nowhere to be found
7. You sleep nude so your post-rapture bed is tidy
8. You were born after 1830
9. You love Christian television
10. You use your newspaper for morning devotions
11. You’d rather have been outside Noah’s ark
12. You don't think satan really noticed the cross
13. You prefer the shadows
14. Always always means always except sometimes
15. You went to Dallas Theological Seminary
16. Bad news excites you
17. You feel Scofields notes were inspired
18. You can’t speak b/c you are in parenthesis
19. You’ll only be a 2nd class citizen of paradise
20. You found my pin the tail series thought provoking
21. You think THIS means THAT
22. You think NEAR means FAR
23. You thought about naming your kid Darby
24. You decided it’s too late to have kids
25. You’re offended by this list
2. You’ve never read Hebrews
3. You can justify being 2000 years late for an appointment
4. You’re really bad at math
5. You think Kirk Cameron is a fine actor
6. When the going gets rough, you’re nowhere to be found
7. You sleep nude so your post-rapture bed is tidy
8. You were born after 1830
9. You love Christian television
10. You use your newspaper for morning devotions
11. You’d rather have been outside Noah’s ark
12. You don't think satan really noticed the cross
13. You prefer the shadows
14. Always always means always except sometimes
15. You went to Dallas Theological Seminary
16. Bad news excites you
17. You feel Scofields notes were inspired
18. You can’t speak b/c you are in parenthesis
19. You’ll only be a 2nd class citizen of paradise
20. You found my pin the tail series thought provoking
21. You think THIS means THAT
22. You think NEAR means FAR
23. You thought about naming your kid Darby
24. You decided it’s too late to have kids
25. You’re offended by this list
15 comments:
i like the new look...very christmasy
very temporary
the blinding brightness will return
pha ha ha ha ha
LOL! sadly, about half of the things on this list apply to my parents at one point or another. yikes!
I could make a case for maybe 9 of them applying to me at one time or another. But now just 1.
which one?
8
Hey Matt, found your blog through preteristsite.com Pretty funny dispy list, I'll have to print that out. God bless.
- Rob
Glad you liked it. Merry Christmas :)
Interesting. I found this site as I am working on my Th.D. Dissertation for a work titled "Reformed Evangelical Dispensationalism" which is what I am.
Keith Sherlin
Translation. I did not understand the point 18.
http://www.monergismo.com/textos/dispensacionalismo/voce-poderia-dispensacionalista_rose.pdf
Dispensationalists believe the church is more or less a giant parenthesis b/w God's OT dealings with Israel and His future dealings with Israel.
When reading out loud, we don't often voice what comes in parenthesis (they are silent).
And so #18 is a reference to gentile believers being mute due to being inside of parenthesis.
Greatest list ever!!
Oh... but I think most of those comments will fly over a dispie's head.
I laughed so hard after reading #18...that is good, but I think it is high time you updated your pin the tail list!
Totally agree about Last Days Madness...Delmar is great. Another good book is Sign of the Kingdom by George E. Kouri.
God Bless!
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