Perhaps the best way to illustrate the wonders of online dating is to show you an actual conversation I had on December 21st. Her name was Isabela and she was, apparently a Chinese girl currently living in Africa. She instant messaged me for the first and only time just before midnight that evening.
gertrudemago: hi
mattrose: hiya
gertrudemago: how are you?
mattrose: Doing pretty well...just waiting to get tired
mattrose: how are you?
gertrudemago: iam fine, thanx.
gertrudemago: are you married?
mattrose: nope
gertrudemago: ok
Ok, so a pretty typical start. We have established our names along with my singleness
gertrudemago: can we be friends?
mattrose: sure, why not? :)
mattrose: where are you from?
gertrudemago: china.
mattrose: do you still live there?
gertrudemago: no
gertrudemago: iam living in africa now.
gertrudemago: can i see your picture
mattrose: there are pics of me in China on our church website. www.hessroadwesleyan.com
gertrudemago: you are very handsome:)
mattrose: :"> well thank you
mattrose: i liked your picture too
gertrudemago: ok
gertrudemago: you must be very kind.:)
mattrose: haha, no...i am mean usually
Seems like a nice enough girl so far, and she has good taste!
mattrose: how long have you lived in Africa?
gertrudemago: for 10 years.
mattrose: how old are you?
gertrudemago: iam 22 years old.
gertrudemago: you?
mattrose: 23
gertrudemago: ok.
gertrudemago: one year older than me:)
mattrose: yep....so do you like living in Africa?
gertrudemago: not really.
gertrudemago: i want to come to states if i can get help.
mattrose: oh, i see....have you ever been here?
gertrudemago: no.
mattrose: why do you want to come here?
gertrudemago: i want to get married by an american.
gertrudemago: like you
Okay, so she's a little forward
mattrose: haha
mattrose: aren't there any nice young men in Africa?
gertrudemago: africans are liars.
mattrose: all of them?
gertrudemago: many.
mattrose: well that's too bad
gertrudemago: there is one say here in africa which says that" IF ONE FISH IS ROTTEN THEN ALL FISHES HAVE BEEN ROTTEN".
mattrose: hmmm...interesting
mattrose: you have many brothers and sisters?
gertrudemago: yes
gertrudemago: chinese and africans.
mattrose: how many all together?
gertrudemago: 10.
mattrose: are you the oldest, youngest..or somewhere in the middle?
gertrudemago: middle.
She has a pretty big family, and I was about to find out they were, perhaps, struggling financially...
gertrudemago: can you help me bro?
mattrose: In what way?
gertrudemago: With money. At least to have something in this xmass.
mattrose: i don't know. how would i get you it? Plus, I don't really know you very well.
gertrudemago: oh my,
mattrose: what?
gertrudemago: im just sad.
gertrudemago: to know me how? because as the days go we will get to know each well.
mattrose: well...it is just dangerous to try to help people online b/c there are many people who lie on the internet, not that you're necessarily lying.
mattrose: is there a good church in your town?
gertrudemago: yes catholic.
gertrudemago: i changed to catholic.
mattrose: well....is your church able to help you at all?
gertrudemago: iam just asking you to help me to buy clothes and shoes for this christ mass
mattrose: oh, i see. Well, I would recommend you ask your catholic church for help. I am sure they wouldn't turn you away if you really need clothes
gertrudemago: bro, please help me.
mattrose: have you tried asking the church?
gertrudemago: and iam a foreigner here they don't know me much.
gertrudemago: i don't need much money, just a small sacrifice bro.
mattrose: haha...I don't even know how I'd send you money. But I really don't think I can help you at this point.
mattrose: I think you should go to the Catholic church and ask for help.
gertrudemago: ok
mattrose: I'm sorry
gertrudemago: ok, bye
Abrupt ending. It was almost as if she was just out for money. Maybe she really needed money. Who knows. Either way, I don't think I'll be hearing from Isabela again.
8 comments:
this seems like a blatant rip off of a feature on my site.
I have met few women, even from other linguistic backgrounds, who use "bro" so liberally as your friend there. I vote that it was a scam, and badly executed at that.
Anonymous...
actually, i stole the idea from my brother's site. but there's no way he'll find out b/c he doesn't even take the time to read my blog. plus, he's too busy trying to make his site better than mine, and that must take a lot of hard work!
Andrew...
I agree, I'm pretty sure it was a scam. Pretty funny.
yea it was funny. since it was an instant message you could almost call it "Instant Comedy"...
or maybe do a really dumb name like "IM FUNNY"
I think that's hilarious Matt. If nothing else, it'll make a good story for your kids one day...
Plus...i was tired so i found it extra funny
Wow, that's WEIRD. I'll admit, I was sucked into eHarmoney too, and now everytime I hear an ad, I want to beat Neil upside the head. I seemed to be such a good match for guys who were "online dating for a reason", so I quit. Money wasted, in my mind. But whatever...but wow, your convo is kind of freaky. You're responses were very level-headed. Seriously, what Chinese person would move to Africa? Yeah right--they have more brains than that. If they were broke, they wouldn't be going to Africa. I think Isabella is a GUY.
I could almost hear the Adam's apple bobbing in that "girl's" throat! What chic says "bro"?
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